BEAST PAGE 3 PORN STORE CLERK
Name: Abner Moria
Turn-ons: Benedictine Monk chants, rubber hot pants, grainy video, Sally Jesse Raphael.
Turn-offs: See-thru bags, condoms, broken promises, my father
How I became the BEAST Page 3 Porn Store Clerk: This guy comes in. As usual I avoid eye contact. But he goes straight to the counter and whips out a Beast. I'm like, wow! He wants to know if he can leave a bunch of 'em by the door. I look through the thing and see our best customer prominently displayed in the paper. So, I'm like "Sure, Tom will get a kick out of seeing his face in here. I mean he's always getting picked up in the store by men anyway." Anyhow I notice The Beast guy just standing there. Finally I go, "What do you need?" He says something about senior citizens. I show him the section. He buys like ten tapes, and tells me about page three.
Future plans: I still gotta inflate the new dolls for the window display, clean the screens in the video booth, and finish disposing of mother.
How I want to be remembered: Well hopefully I won't always be labeled as the Page 3 Porn Store Clerk. I'll probably be remembered for the time I was caught looking into the girls shower room through a peephole with all my friends. Wait, that was in Porky's.