I really enjoyed
the piece on the Top Ten Signs of an Impending Police State. Very accurate.
I also wanted to add one, or really embellish upon the last one, about the
CIA. Not only is Negroponte (king of death squads in Central and South America)
the newly appointed caretaker of the bewildered herd, but the entire security,
police structure and military have been quietly re-aligned, purged of the
non-kool-aid crowd and, re-organized under a central authority...i.e. the
neocon/Bush machine's new Department of Homeland Security. Odd how the Nazis
did the same thing...just coincidence surely. Also coincidence that Hitler
declared his new police 'defenders of the homeland'.
these concerns about Bush’s trampling of civil liberties are troubling. A
sober, objective public analysis of the situation is long overdue. And there’s
nothing better to foster such serious debate than constantly equating your
opponent to Hitler.
[sic] OF IT ALL
Dear Evil Editor-In-Cheif,
like to start this off by saying that I love this paper, and reading it while
I sat behind the counter and nothing at work really made my day. Actually,
It's the only reason why I kept working there...
for the real madness to this e-mail, I'd like the tell you about a story that
you may be interested in printing. I am (at this moment but not for much longer)
a student at St. Joesph's Collegiate Institute (SJCI) and I'm really tired
of the pure bull that they have been feeding me this entire year. Besides
the constand detentions and punishments due to the fact that my hair touched
the collar of my uniform dress shirt (because long hair OBVIOUSLY distracts
my ability to learn...especially in an all boys school), the stupid greedy
school kicked me out this year. Not because I did anything wrong, and not
even because my hair touched my collar, and not even because I dyed my hair
black, but because I don't have the money to afford it. While they sit there
and fund every athletic person so they have free tuition, I get screwed out
of a good education, not to mention, it would be easier for me in life just
saying I went to St. Joes. They wouldn't even give me a dime, because their
quota was already over, and they couldn't give someone like me any money so
I could get the education that they are already greedy enough to ask for $8,100
a year. Not only that, but while they are poor and begging for their catholic
charities and holding huge fun raisers where they get $20,000+, they are also
spending a sum in excess of 2 million dollars to redo sports fields and other
parts of the buliding, and even giving the Lasallian Brothers a newer house.
I'm pissed because St. Joes didn't even let me keep my dignity, they made
sure they snatched it up when they told me that they were kicking me out of
the school because I couldn't afford it, but they made sure to make a payment
plan so they could get all of the money I owe them as of now. Personally,
I know this sounds like a sob story, but I figured this is somthing thats
so stupid and that it really shows how money hungry the catholic religion,
and how greedy many religions are, not to mention private schools.
sorry, but I won't say my name, seeing if it were to be put in the article
if you publish it (WHICH I HOPE YOU DO) because people who my father works
for send their kids there and they think the school is the best thing ever.
Then again, they make enough money to afford it.
also in the process of photoshopping a nice image of a swastika armband on
the dean guy who makes me cut my hair and to button my top button when the
school is abouit 110 degrees. Just in case you want it.
thanks ahead of time)
Huge Fan, and
a kid whos pissed at St. Joes
is an outrage. For you to be deprived of your rightful life of privilege is
unfathomable. You’re like, the Rosa Parks of snotty white boys or something.
such grave injustices are known to befall many great iconoclasts such as you.
On the bright side, you will be able to coast through the rest of high school
and the first two years of state college on the strength of your relatively
accelerated educational history. You may even manage to pick up a similarly
maladjusted girl, if you spend enough time sitting alone, brooding quietly
and rereading your copy of Catcher
in the Rye.
the way, if you think that withholding your name will protect your identity,
there must be more poor kids with long, dyed-black hair and discipline problems
at St. Joe’s than we thought. Life sucks, kid. Now go get a tattoo.
When's the new
issue due out? Can't wait! Love reading Uthman
it’s out now!
To the writer
of below article:
In regards to
the article below taking from your magazine; I question one's ability to fully
disregard a show before its actually occurred. I understand your intent is
to give your readers an "inside scoop" of what to expect & try
to help people plan their outings for a good time. What is written below
however is a display not only of your opinion but of your stupidity as well.
Next time, why don't you provide links for readers to view bands and create
their own opinions (myspace is a beautiful thing) if you took the time to
do that for yourself, which you obviously did not, you would know that Setiva
who played last on that show are far from embracing shittiness or inexperienced
musicians. In fact, these guys are some of the most down to earth fellas
who are not even hardcore, dude if you don't even know the difference between
genres WTF are you doing writing up your opinion about shows anyhow? It takes
a lesser man to judge than to do it themselves. I suggest you take your head
out of your ass and go check out a Setiva show next time they bless buffalo
with one or hey here's a link www.myspace.com/setiva.
know, we were going to provide a link to that all-important friggin’ myspace
page in that write-up, but our IT department is still having some trouble
integrating HTML code into wood-pulp. If we wanted to leave our readers to
their own opinions, we’d be in bed right now. Still, you’re right that we
shouldn’t have jumped the gun, so we checked out their music, and now the
truth can be told: Setiva is a tired retread of every suburban rock/metal
band from the ‘80s forward, with the novel twist that they like weed. Generally
speaking, when bands spell their own names wrong, things can only go downhill
from there. We don’t doubt that they’re “down to earth,” it’s just that their
music sucks and, you know, we wouldn’t hold that against them, except that
they’re in a band. Opinions are like MySpace pages, “Bridget;” everybody’s
NO IT WASN’T
I just read your
piece on John Stossel (issue #94). It was first-rate investigative reporting;
keep up the good work.
yes, who can forget that gripping report, digging deep into Stossel’s secret…
ABC prime time special. Live from Jones’ office chair. The travel expenses
alone nearly put us out of business, but it was worth it.
YES WE CAN’T
with the political articles I've read in The Beast. My question is: Could
you make the articles more printer friendly? Please say "yes".
Here at The BEAST, our IT division has worked many long hours to crack the
secret to printer-friendliness, and we have devised an ingeniously simple
but powerful solution. Just follow this simple 5-step process:
Using your mouse, click and drag your cursor from the beginning to the end
of your favorite BEAST article, releasing the button when you have selected
the entire text.
Click “Edit” and then “Copy” in your browser’s menu.
Now open your favorite word processing application, such as Microsoft Word
or Corel WordPerfect—even a basic text editor such as Notepad will do!
Click “Edit” and “Paste” in your application’s menu. The article’s text appears
in the open document, as if by magic!
Click on “File” and then “Print,” and behold! The BEAST article that was once
on the screen is transformed into a paper document.
right? We sure didn’t waste money on good old Rajneesh and Quang-Thieu.
we have only attempted this innovative technique on articles appearing at
our own site, buffalobeast.com, and we can make no guarantees about the effectiveness
or safety of attempting to apply this method of screen-to-paper meta-transference
on any other website. We recommend against it, but if you make such an attempt,
do so at your own risk!
Dear Sir (Dear
I have read your posting at
regarding the irresponsible allegations of Rispens concerning Peter Debye.
Cornell University has finished an investigation subsequent to Rispens' accusations
and a copy of their report is attached. Cornell finds the Rispens allegations
without merit. In mid-June, a report of the investigation by the directors
of the former Debye Institute at Utrecht university will be published and
I can tell you now that it will also report Rispens' allegations as baseless
(and simply as a keen media strategy to sell his book).
glad to hear that he’s being cleared. Debye was cool, though we’re really
more Neils Bohr fans. Atomic structure totally rocks! Besides, how racist
can a guy be when he first described the “Compton effect,” which we assume
can only be a scientific model of NWA’s radicalizing effect on rap music,
in 1923? Dr. Debye was a true O.G., as his colleague Dr. Dre would no doubt
agree. Anyway, we wouldn’t have thought Cornell would even have a problem
with a genuine Nazi association—didn’t Ann Coulter go there?
on the Top 10 Signs of the Impending Police State on www.PrisonPlanet.com
You know, Beast,
Christians love liberty too. Patrick Henry's great speech is a case in point.
Then there is
the Lord freeing the Jews from bondage in Egypt and the quote by the Apostle
Paul in Galatians 5:1 "Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith
Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage."
It has been atheist,
secular humanists, even Satanists such as Hitler, Pol Pot, Stalin and Mao
Tse Tung who have set up the worst totalitarian dictatorships. You know, Nixon
was and Bush is foul-mouthed.
I was really
enjoying your article until I came to that unnecessary adjective in #8. It
somewhat turned me off to the article. Even though you may laugh, Jesus tells
us that if we have aught against an action of another, we should come to him
and tell him politely what our concern is.
I love my Lord,
and I want to do what He says in His Word.
So I did. Thanks
for listening, Beast. Keep on speaking up.!
Tyranny is Obedience To God,
know what Jesus also said? “But those mine enemies, which would not that I
should reign over them, bring hither, and slay [them] before me” (Luke 19:27).
Sounds kind of Stalinesque to us. And Alex Jones is a goddamn blithering idiot,
who probably works undercover for the government to make reasonable conspiracy
theorists look crazy. Hell, you should submit that story to Prison Planet;
he’d probably run with it. But hey, Alan, we’re real fucking sorry about the
swearing, man. Really, we feel like shit about it.
You guy's are
frighteningly right in your surmations of the situation. However, it remains
to be seen if we will live as slaves.
you have work to do?
Instead of making
deadly accurate lists like this, why aren't you lot running the country? Y
I'd vote for you although my knowledge of who you are and what your policies
would be is infinitesimal - well no, less than that even.
Glad you got onto that pitiful, self-hating, mysoginist Malkin bitch. She's
usually overlooked, probably not taken seriously because she's all the things
she hates so much.
(Pale brown, slanty-eyed, roots like a rattlesnake but is married to man who
hates sex with his wife, and has married white.) One of her sentences should
have been to be peed on by that wanker R. Kelly.)
Your folks list is the most intelligent survey produced in writing this year.
forgot “anchor baby” and “drive-by citizen.”
to me, I know
you're list is legit when I see touch screen voting machines.
I came to the
I saw what they
I wrote it up
in a co-authored scientific paper www.votersunite.org/info/SnohomishElectionFraudInvestigation.pdf
We found that
touch screens taken out of service with under 30 votes voted 50% more for
the Republican gubernatorial candidate than for the democratic candidate in
a dem county in the closest gubernatorial race in US history (with a hand
recount of paper ballots)
And, I've attempted
to conquer, (filing a lawsuit) www.votersunite.org/info/lehtolawsuit.asp
Thanks for your
work on this list though, I saw it distributed by Mark crispin miller I do
some writing myself and know that distribution is key
- Paul Lehto
Attorney at Law
MOONBAT! TED KENNEDY! MICHAEL MOORE! CRAZY! LIBERAL! LIBERAL DEMOCRAT! LOONEY
LEFT! TREASON! CUT & RUN! CONSPIRACY THEORIST! AID & COMFORT! BLAME
GAME! Er… TED KENNEDY!
Thank God that’s over. Moving on…
HUGE DOWN UNDER
Hello from NZ
if you had a downloadable link that I could use for my MySpace profile? Time
the rest of the world knew about you. Much respect.
Angry Andy Ewen
DJ and upholder of unfettered, free speech.
downloadable link? Rajneesh? Quang-Thieu? RAJNEESH!? Where the hell are those
guys when you need them? Oh, right, the opium run. Well, you’ll have to be
patient, our not-quite Aussie friend—our IT guys will be back in a few days,
assuming the condoms don’t burst. Till then just throw another shrimp on the
barbie or something (sorry, we’re drawing a blank on New Zealander stereotypes).
I know it isn’t
Christmas but I wanted to send you my Christmas letter anyway just so you
would know what a kindred spirit I am. In all seriousness even though I am
a disabled Vietnam veteran having a flashback in an alcoholic blackout I find
your writing to be stellar. It’s much better and funnier than anything I have
seen since the old national lampoon and certainly much more wickedly clever
than things like “The Onion.”
I hope you
guys are rich because of this or at least getting rich, but I kind of doubt
that you are and thats too bad, your stuff is genius ,so I hope you keep it
David W Scott
this is the beast Christmas ever! Seriously, we’re glad we could momentarily
distract you from the imaginary gook silhouettes on the rooftops across the