Local tales From our current issue:

WHL-Duh!
Local AM station bans BEAST after severe panty-bunching incident

Of BANANAs & Bonobos
BEAST scores watery blow against acronym proliferation

(more to come...)

Issue 103:


Paper of Wreckage
NYT reporters caught red-handed reporting.
Allan Uthman

Gay Marriage Threatens Gay Happiness
A Fabulous BEAST Editorial
Ian Murphy

Flag Football
How illegal should it be?
Rich Herschlag

Eternal Sunshine of the Heartless Brain
Fox News launches Santorum's Weapon of Mass Delusion.
Christopher Famighetti

Sinking the Ship
Let's impeach him already.
Stan Goff

Ask Ann Coulter
Completely original advice from the world's foremost dumbass.

Starving for Attention
Exclusive celebrity fasting diary excerpts.

Authorities reveal failed plot to kill everyone
in New York City with motherfucking behemoth
laser-guided remote controlled killer bees

What Would Tom Bosley Do?
You may regret asking.
N. Sorrenti

Man Makes Clever Joke about France Surrendering World Cup
Josh Righter

Page 3 Falsified Death

Kino Korner: Movies
Supterman, Pirates of the Carribean, Click, Devil Wears Prada.

Music review: Knife Crazy
Jacob Drun

BEAST-O-Scopes
Your cosmic fortune in insult form.

[sic] - Letters
Coulter-bashing, progeny tallies, the Bauerle conspiracy, & vacationing down under.


Pointless
Feeding the ultimate troll.
Al Uthman

Bananarama
Belafonte can't shake tally-man past.
Christopher Famighetti

A Small Rabbit out of a Big Hat
Pentagon media moguls cancel Zarqawi.
Stan Goff

Al Qaeda Idol
Vote for the next #2!

The BEAST Conservative Q&A
Answering questions that plague Republicans.

Five Questions...
for WGRZ anchor Ron Plants!

Coping with Road Rage
What can you do?
Scott Borchert

Hammer Hits Hollywood
The Big Buy: Tom DeLay’s Stolen Congress
Movie Review by Matt Cale

Stormtrooping for Dollars
Blog by boys in blue bodes badly for Buffalo

Power Tool
Brian Higgins, the enemy within

 


Sinking the Ship
Let's Impeach him Already

By Stan Goff

The Supreme Court ruling on June 30th that declared the Bush administration action in Guantanamo a violation of both the Uniform Code of Military Justice and the Geneva Conventions has now set the stage for the impeachment of George W. Bush and Dick Cheney. At a meeting in Raleigh that night, I co-appeared with Al McSurley — a veteran civil rights attorney, who reads these tea leaves as well as anyone I know.

The ruling class is recognizing that the Bush administration has become an albatross, and this is a clear signal from the judiciary that appointed then in the first place that they have become a political liability. The repeated criticisms from Republican Arlen Specter are also an indication. The fear among Republicans that the Democrats might win the House and award the House Judiciary Committee to Representative John Conyers, who is openly calling for impeachment, is palpable. Many Republicans are already eyeing the lifeboats.

There will likely be a move to draft John McCain into the presidential contender slot as a way of disavowing the black-shirted edge given the Party’s image by the neocons.

In the interim, this is a window of opportunity that may open wider as more scandals come to the surface over the next four months.

Berkeley, California is actually hosting a referendum on impeachment, and other small cities have already passed resolutions.

What this means, in short-range tactical terms, is that there is now an opportunity to build a movement to turn the 2006 elections into a referendum on the entire Bush presidency… and this necessarily includes the war.

Those who know me know that I am the last person out there to encourage tailing Democrats as a principle. But I am also opposed to the kind of ultra-leftism that cannot see tactical opportunities out of some presumed purity. There is a real possibility to build a very broad movement between now and November 8th that targets state capitol newspaper editorial boards (which local television and radio news inevitably follow) and uses its movement visibility to educate the public on the kinds of crimes that have been committed by the Bush administration.

The combination of anti-war forces generally and progressive Democrats, as well as women’s groups, African-American groups, and Hispano-Latina groups, have immense potential to break through this fissure and exploit it. Success in this would create the kind of oxygen bolus that was created for the period during and immediately after the Watergate hearings in 1973.

If we can make this happen, there is no doubt that the Democratic Leadership Council and others will try to conceal the systemic roots of our issues, but that is the next phase of this struggle… overcoming that. First, we need an impeachment movement. Be assured that the ruling class will not let this get to the point of an actual impeachment and conviction.

Newspaper editorial boards to cover actual crimes of the Bush administration.

Municipal referenda or resolutions for impeachment.

Massive public education.

The wall is weak here… PUSH!

 

BEAST Blog

Idiot Box by Matt Bors
Big Fat Whale by Brian McFadden
Perry Bible Fellowship by Nicholas Gurewitch
Bob the Angry Flower by Stephen Notely
Deep Fried by Jason Yungbluth

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John Stossel's Invisible Handjob
The Great Buffalo-Ottawa Mayoral Prank
I'm with Stupid: Tony Snow
10 Questions for Scott McClellan
Ask Dr. Cruise
Guide to Post-9/11 Opportunism
GWB's Rapture Report
Iraqi Civil War Chess Set
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