Aug 9 - Sep 7, 2006
ISSUE #105
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Features

Sympathy for the Beagle
Chinese dissidents yearn to be treated like dogs
Allan Uthman

DICKLESS
David Brooks donates genitals in noble pursuit of status quo
Matt Taibbi

HILL ON FIRE
Hillary Clinton copulates with the ghost of Richard Nixon
Matt Taibbi

Happy Hiroshima
John Hershey's Hiroshima turns 60
Alexander Zaitchik

Happy Election 2008
An Exclusive BEAST Preview
Josh Bunting

Local BEAST

Buffalo in Briefs
Kunz Goldman: keepin' it real ... dumb
Ian Murphy

Alt Weakly
The BEAST grades the remodeled Rochester Insider
Brian Sek

Violent Femmes
Thursday in the Square
Reviewed By a Preachy Christian Asshole

Departments

Sprouting Sweet Potato

Kino Korner: Movies
Talladega Nights, Miami Vice, The Night Listener, The Descent, Scoop, John Tucker Must Die

BEAST-O-Scopes
As divined by your etheral guide

[sic] - Letters
Mad Maximalist, The Man Without a Case, The Passion of The Wrist and more


Review of Violent Femmes at Thursday in The Square
continued - page 2

Im hyperventilating right now. Without my physical proclamation of my faith in the Lord, destitute minorities might try to sell me crack or acid or whatever theyre calling it these days. Im totally vulnerable and theres nothing I can do about it. After a few repetitions of singing Our God is an Awesome God at the top of my lungs, my throat gets dry. I pray again, this time for the Lord God to forgive me, as I stand in line waiting for beer tickets.

Things get pretty hazy after that point. A familiar looking young lady serving me my fifth or so round said she had made one of my beers special for me. Ill just say that that demonic little bitch doled out to me a concoction which certainly does not honor God. A policewoman woke me up outside Hotel Lafayette a few hours later. I was only wearing my underwear and had strange marks all over my body.

From now on, Ill stay far away from anything marked special. It will probably make my ass sore.



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