right it's time to tear down the two bedroom house of cards [Stan
the Fuse,” issue #92]. Today only a few are called to open
the eyes of the many that are loosing the little they have. We
that see the truth must lean quickly how to make a lot of noise,
and wake up our neighbors. Unlike 95% of the population that believes
that they are above average I understand that I am not. The party
of the rich, by the rich, for the rich must be brought down or we
will loose our country. Daily I quietly bash the republican machine
and when asked if I am a democrat I just say no. The republicans
have no morals and the dems have no balls.
time has come to fly the flag upside-down. But it's not just the
war that they lied us into - they have broken promises, created
laws to make criminals out of those who would challenge them, emptied
the treasury, taken from the poor and given to the rich,
that fucken fuse - I understand that unjust
power burns in a spectacular fashion, and remember the sun is always
largest just before it sets.
Oak Creek, WI
have a good life.
bye bye miss
american pie - if you are right all shit
is going to break loose soon.
Dave, are you on laxatives?
article Lit my fuse and I'm ready to explode, it's as if Mr. Goff
was channeling my thoughts and feelings
in total agreement. Lets bring down the
curtain on those who steal, lie, and cheat (politicians). Repub/Dem alike no difference, they all live for the status
quo, representing only there own sorry asses.Since
for most ordinary people the pain isn't great enough for them to
get off their anesthetized butts I don't expect pitchforks in the
street, but this American is ready to fight. If you need help call
Wolf, Wantagh NY
Kenny, that’s cool; you can save the world yourself. We’re tired
BAD TO WORSE
been thinking within the past few weeks since the dems
did not filibuster Alito . . . why am
i sticking to this do nothing party?????
I said to myself . . . look into becoming a Green. Could you
tell me how I do that???? I mean I am 62 years old and
have been a Dem forever. How do i
make the switch. I live in Wisconsin
. . . what do i do to get involved with
the Green party at the grassroots action level?
so sick of the spineless Democrats that I could p - - e!
really wish we could recommend the Greens, Judith, but they intentionally
avoided conflict with the Democrats in the last election, proving
themselves to be the non-confrontational
hippie wusses we always knew they were.
No, what we need is a new party altogether, eschewing the off-putting
patchouli aroma that “Green” inevitably evokes. Maybe
a different color? The Black party?
Too scary? Oh, how about the White party?
We could walk around chanting, “White pow”—oh
shit, no. Wait—we’ve got it! The Free Blowjobs party. With a name like that, we’ll take
over within months! Even if we lose, we’re bound to have a good
Piece of Meat.
I've been trying for years now and they ain't
listnen. Were are
in deep dodo with this drunkin sot of
a pres, and they let these idiot media crap on them when they are
on CNN, or any other talk show.
like that would get better ratings than Neil Cavuto.
said (privately, to my husband) everything I read from you today.
My hope is that a third party can be created which will cause the
Dems to lose even more. Maybe it
will take a few election cycles, but eventually the sweet music
of defiance and questioning of authority will catch on.
How can I help?
1: Get rid of the husband.
adverse to the administrations intent after 9/11 was harmful to
a pols health. Paul Wellstone's accident
("his plane crashed in a snow storm with no snow") left
a bad taste in most republicrats mouth's.
"Well I think I'd be safer just to back this Iraq freedom thing".
not alone, Nailset: 69% of Minnesotans blamed “a GOP conspiracy” for
Wellstone’s crash. We remember the day well, because we were near
the crash site when it happened. We found this cool-looking device
called a “Northrop Grumman Electromagnetic Pulse Emitter Gun” that
fell off the back of a NORAD truck, but when we pulled the trigger,
it didn’t do anything, so we put it down and kept walking. The next
thing you know, BLAMMO!
recent piece about the fallacy of "balance" [Allan
Balance, & Bullshit,” issue #92] hit the proverbial
nail on the head. I agree that this disturbing trend is a result
of corporate media consolidation rather than any reflection of ideology;
it's just a convenient method for controlling the terms of any debate.
We can all thank Clinton for the that -
"the Great Triangulator's" gift
to us all. If anything THAT is the thing we should forever hold
his feet to the fire over.
I love the Beast and your uncompromising 50 Most Loathsome list
is an absolute tonic. You always reference certain "unassailable"
personalities that so deserve to be pilloried. (Thomas Freidman for instance). Your statement about Rove,
"A greasy pig whose only distinction in life is his total lack
of decency", is almost poignant in it's
simplicity yet absolutely true. And as far as "balance"
is concerned it seems to me that you've included several sacred
cows of the left including Hillary, Jesse Jackson, Oprah.
You've included Michael Moore in past lists, who seems to be the
the go-to guy for whipping up phony republican
outrage. Anyway good work. I appreciate
what you are doing.
Thom. Now please remove our balls from your mouth.
Bias, Balance, & Bullshit
absolutely splendid piece. I'm going to become a regular
Howard. What kind of reader were you before?
Dear Mr. Luthman,
I came accross your website recently. After reading the titled article
[“Bias, Balance, & Bullshit”],
I had to respond to it. The premise of your long-winded, nonsensical
viewpoint is so far left that any reader comes away dismissing you
as just another looney radical left wing nutcase.
If your webpage was more centrist, I think I could actually find
myself reading it occasionally. But in it's
present wacky form, it ain't gonna happen. Enjoy the Kool-Aid.
hit the nail right on the head...I could never figure out this "
he said...she said...he said..she said...." and
that is the extent of the issue...this is absolutely insane...of
course there are no absolute truths...but there are ABSOLUTE LIES....and
why should these be represented alongside known facts...in a debate...this
is surely figured out by the Conservative Think Tanks as the way
to go...and so it is...and so the public swallows it...and
so...the country is going down the drain.....
"Bias, Balance and Bullshit"...an
absolutely outstanding piece. Thanks for writing it, but I
fear that your's is a voice crying in
the wilderness. Right-wing bias is now pervasive and firmly
entrenched, and I think it will be very difficult to change that,
at least in the short term.
Bob, you’re right. We give up.
can a human being live with the amount of venom you people have
in your blood stream. I earnesly
pray for you.
way things are going it won't be long for the world to be dominated
by people who won't allow you to put out this kind of destructive
material and perhaps not even exist. For your sakes don't try to
post a cartoon of Mohammed. You can be tracked down...
brand of "satirical" destructive freedom can be be
your own demise. I truly wish the very opposite for you and for
the sake of my eight healthy, handsome and intelligent grandsons.
At 62, extremely healthy, and living a wonderfully blessed life,
because of my faith I am looking forward to dying. This world holds
no attraction to me. If I am wrong and the God of the Bible does
not exist I have lost absolutely nothing.
the Lord Jesus bless you as much or more than I desire him to bless
my loved ones.
thanks Paul! Maybe now we can get into heaven without doing anything
stupid like give a crap about fairy tales. You have not lost nothing,
Paul, you have lost the dignity of a person who knows the difference
between real and make-believe. But if you’re cool with that, then
go with God, gramps. Oh, and about that cartoon—you’re too late.
As a dutiful, smartass, pissed off leftist, I subscribe to The Nation,
and find it a useful source of facts with which to pillory conservative
co-workers and family. Of course, they would never let actual facts
dissuade them from their righteous, rightest ideology, but it’s fun watching
them get all bombastic and apoplectic. That, however, is beside
cover illustration on the issue dated Feb. 20th fairly
leapt off the page. Genius! GOP Scandal trading cards! déjà vu! I’ve seen this someplace before! Oh yeah. In the Beast.
(It was funnier the first
time…) Congratulations! I was a bit surprised that I didn’t
find any acknowledgement of the Beast as the origin, but what do
I know? They say great minds think alike, and, of course this must
be the case.
an international bar-dak be far behind?
Think they’re hiring? Keep up the good work.
If it’s not too personal, just where do you get those tongues
Depot. Those mom & pop tongue-sharpening
places are just too pricey in this global economy.
I agree with many of your choices, the totality of your
list exposes "The Beast" as a left wing radical group.
Your credibility is compromised when your readers recognize this
and understand your views are not "fair and balanced". To
assign Bill O'Reilly the #10 spot, one behind the BTK killer says
it all. Too bad, I think "The Beast" could have been interesting.
O’Reilly warn you to stay away from the far left liberal smear merchant
websites? Shame on you! Now your perfectly empty mind has been forever
tainted by exposure to critical thought. You might as well donate
your life savings to George Soros, saving
just enough for a lifetime subscription to the far left New York
Times! Next time, just play it safe and don’t read anything. Except
Bill O’Reilly’s books, of course! He’s so great. Couldn’t you just
kiss him? What a hero!
CLEVER TO LIVE
still my bleeding heart. Since New Year's I've been doing the Sunshine-State
Shake in my sandals down here, indeed for the entirety of Jan and
on in to Feb, allthewhile entertaining
frightful notions regarding the continued lack of your publication
in my PO Box. Whereas I was hoping The Powers That Be hadn't smote
you with an unfair Fahrenheit, I more feared a smaller They had
culled and confiscated my most combustible monthly periodic parcel
to a government cinerarium […] Chaddering
I had one lone wish: you had taken the money for my subscription
and ran, ran for office collectively as a thoughtfully-tanked Oligarchy
of all media (King Stern having retired to his castle in the sky).
I resorted to checking the mail once a week. But then finally Volume
#91 arrived. (My arms outstretched) "There is a Beast!"
excellent Holiday cover which had so tickled my fancy I immediately
ripped it off at the spine, and after standard-bearing it over to
my kitchenette I cornered its frame with four refrigerator magnets
(of a 3D Niagara Falls, the bipedal Geico
lizard, a Bills buffalo and a seated puppy of labradorian
mixture) for maximum viewage-potential
right to the fridgedoor for every hungry visitor to be unseasonably greeted
by. Indeed the light does go out behind the closed door, for it
was on the reverse of the front page where I should have been warned
about you guys going on hiatus, had I not been on my bread-alone
diet resolution. I resolve now to take down the rest of my decorations,
as soon as I get back to the mainland and off of this desert island.
Cayo Costa, florida state park, nice place.
The Beast fits comfortably in a beach bag. Were you aware you can
now plug your laptop in to wireless-equipped conch shells on most
barrier islands in the coastal county. This particular little piece
of paradise is just a stone's throw from the Bush family's favorite
resort island of Gasparilla (named after
a pirate, if that doesn't take it), not really a stone's throw per
se, more like: you could launch... an... um...
er... a Frisbee, or rather you couldn't
launch one, not all of the way across the big mouth, I mean Boca
Grande. (This was around where he, Our Chance-seller, was when
it all went down. He fishes down here, that catcher of men, has
been known to be into the whiskey and rye. Now I know a few dolphins...)
@ Fort Myers FL
baby, we can’t lie to you anymore—we’ve been seeing other readers.
Don’t feel bad; you’re cute and everything—it’s just that we’re
no good with these long-distance relationships, you know? Besides,
now that we’re really talking, your puns can get kind of oppressive.
Come on, “Chance-seller?” Yecch.
still love you; we just need a little time. We’ll be back in two
weeks to roger you expertly once again.
your fucking mouth you anti-Jewish racist [“B-b-b-bye,
Sharon-a,” issue #91]
- neither Sharon nor did any Israeli soldier commit the massacre
at Shatila, those were Lebanese Christian
Phalangists. You better read your history
election victory of Hamas is an utter
disaster for the Palestinians as well as Israel; they just committed
suicide by electing a terrorist group. This is completely unacceptable
to Israel. Israel will probably have to utterly defeat this Islamic
fascist threat politically and militarily. Israel will not stand
idly by. With Hamas committing most of
the homicide bombings of innocent Israeli citizens, Israel will
severely punish these murderers who bribe the Palestinian people
with social services. The Arabs are trying to take apart Israel
piece by piece what they could never hope to win in war. Israel
must assert its muscle and take back the so-called "occupied
territories" and expel the Arab occupiers, the "Palestinians”
from Israeli soil.
Hitler got to power by an overwhelming "democratic" majority.
This is prove and outstanding example of the tragically misleading
of "democratic" voting, if basic rules of mutual collaboration
and acceptance are not observed.
years the Jews all over the world have been screaming that the Pals
goal is to wipe out the Jews and today’s election results bear that
out. The Pals chose a group whose goal is the destruction of Israel
- way to go Pals. Is it a bad thing - on the face of it yes but
in reality no? It will prove Israel is and has been right all along
and maybe the threat of war will finally get the egg heads in the
Israeli government to finally say ENOUGH, and banish the Arabs once
and for all. The "peace process" so far has just been
a slow bleeding of Israel, militarily, economically and territorially.
Its time to stop it. Its time to turn Gaza
into Dresden or Hiroshima. Both Germany and Japan stopped
hostilities after those events - now its time for Israel to do the
last week we were “liberal Jews.” At the risk of dying in a hail
of bullets, David, we’d remind you that a number of elected Israeli
leaders were admitted terrorists. PM Menachem
Begin, for instance, ordered the King David Hotel bombing, killing
91 people, mostly civilians, oh and he was ecstatic about the Deir
Yassin massacre of over a hundred Arab
civilians. So when it comes to legitimizing terrorism via elections,
the Palestinians are just playing catch-up.
what were we thinking? Only Muslims can be terrorists, otherwise
this whole “War on Terrorism” thing just gets too complicated. Still,
that’s smart policy, endowing any single Palestinian with the power
to declare war for his entire people. Hey, if you really want to
drop a nuke on the Palestinians, go nuts—we’re sure that wall will
it's finally happened. I finally have to put Christianity on the
back burner as my religion of choice for what ails the human race.
Christianity is responsible for the mass-brainwashing,
and fanatical fervor that led us to our current state of shame to
the nut sacks on high are more powerful then ever, just waiting
to press the button in the name of The Lord Jesus H. Christ.
is with certainty that one cannot walk to the store with out cringing
at some Christian bullshit or another.
true...Christianity is a totally stupid religion.
guessed it...Islam has finally officially surpassed Christianity
as the Most Retarded Religion in the World. Not that Islam hasn't
held it's own thus far in regards to being
a goof ball religion, but man, with the way they have been acting
of late, it's almost hard to use the arguement
that their agression is the fault of American
the Dutch are the problem. The Dutch! A couple cartoons about their
"prophet" and the next thing ya
know, embassies are burning to the ground, and groups of bearded
freaks are all dancing around together with signs about butchering
Dutch people. Wow. Reeal Enlightened Religion.
lets face it, the reason I still live in the U.S. is the fact that
we can bust on Jesus all we want. In fact, I bet even Jesus would
have a chuckle or two at the portrayals of him on South Park, or
the Simpsons, if he existed, which he probably didn't.
and Christianity aside, godmorgen, for
our money, Hindus have the most retarded religion. What the hell
is going on over there, anyway? No—scratch that; Scientology, that’s
the one. No, Kabbalah. The $15 “healing water” and $26 red string
put them over the top.
Issue 91's Buffalo
in Briefs section, you decry the approval of the area's latest
casino in Buffalo. In your article, you first smear libertarians,
and then smear free markets. Apparently you think the casino as
it is being built is an example of the free market run amok. As
any libertarian would tell you, the latest casino will be a government-permitted
and a government-enforced monopoly business--the antithesis of a
free market. You then advocate allowing anyone in the city to buy
a few slot machines or a card table and open up their own "Mom
& Pop" casino. I agree with you--that would be an ideal
solution, would allow people that option of entertainment, and benefit
the small "mom & pops" instead of heavily moneyed,
politically-connected interests. Ironically, if I were a smarter
man, I would recognize your proposal for what it is--free market
gambling. Or--more frightening still--true freedom.
sure, grating pseudonym, either gambling should be legal or not.
The current situation with the Indians is just a lame maneuver for
politicians to dodge their own state laws. But free market gambling
can still be found in various homes and apartments in every neighborhood
on any given day. Hope you like Texas Hold ‘Em. You’re free to lose your rent money to us anytime.
OF THE KUNZ
someone at the Beast please destroy this
woman? Please. After reading another one of her insightful
columns I vomited a little, and proceeded to lose a few points on
my IQ. I don't know why I continued to read after seeing her name
at the top. Maybe I was just curious to see how much idiocy she
could fit into that space. I'll include a link to the article, but
to summarize she basically applauds the gradual reduction in her
rights, finds no problem with forcing all of us to pay $50 for one
of these new passports, and .......you know,
I'll just include this direct quote:
onus isn't on us to keep terrorists from blowing up Niagara Falls."
it's time for another Most Loathsome Buffalonians, or maybe just an article on this waste of life,
time, ink, paper, etc. Other than that I just want to say thanks
for putting something out there that's hilarious and intelligent
at the same time, and for ripping into local politicians and bureaucrats
because no one else will.
she certainly deserves as much derision as this city can muster,
Dmhall, for us the thrill is gone. Kunz’
work is so easily demolished, there’s no challenge in it, like beating
up a malnourished hemophiliac child. Oh sure, it’s fun, but it gets
boring after a while.
always amazes me when I read stuff like this
that nobody has ever mashed your mush filled heads.with
a cinder block just to see the ooze seep out of the cracks.
how you give Ted Kennedy, Micheal Moore,
Nancy Pelosi and just about every other liberal out there a pass
but you're super quick to condemn Republicans and Conservatives.
I guess that's what you get when you lack the mental wherewithall
to actually be objective. I'm an independent politically and
the Democrats, or should I say Dumbocrats,
are veering so far off to the left it makes voting for them
practically impossible. I'm not real thrilled with the Republicans
promising to cut spending and then turning around and spending at
an even more irresponsible rate than the Dumbocrats. I will give this to to
the Republicans, at least they're honest
about not giving a shit about the poor. Whereas Democrats,
and especially liberals, are self-righteous whores whose "concern"
for the "little guy" goes about as deep as your one
centimeter dick into the Grand Canyon sized opening of Paris Hiltons'
far as your #4 selection goes, that is really laughable. I'll
bet you pricks are a bunch of altruists who spend 14 hours a day
helping the poor and down-trodden. Oh wait, that's right you're
a bunch of unemployed, hateful, shitheads whose aggregate I.Q., if it were grains of sand,
wouldn't be enough to fill the inside of fucking Cheerio.
You people are the reason why I'm pro-choice. It must
be nice to sit your fat, ugly, lazy asses on the sidelines and just
hurl vemon at anybody you please
without the fear of having someones' fist
meet your nose forcefully about 20 times.
you all die a painful and slow death,
Fuck you and the cross-eyed whore that spawned you.
we’re employed, Jenny. We get paid to reveal you, in all your murderous
ugliness and rote stupidity. Sure, you’re an “independent.” Right.
Just like O’Reilly. Your “volunteer to help the poor fourteen hours
a day or shut the fuck up and let them starve” argument is so sophisticated
and irrefutable, we’re compelled to vote for Tom Delay in the next
presidential race, but first we’re coming to your house to rip your
face clean off your skull, you fucking worthless twat. We “love”
how soulless cunts like you are unable
to believe that anyone might actually care about poor people, because
you really wish they would just die. We’re not all incapable of
empathy, Jen; just empathy for you.