ATALANTA, GA - In a statewide referendum that passed with overwhelming numbers, Georgians have decided they will operate the state on prayer and faith in God rather than on the mysterious, invisible vagaries of electricity.

"There is no mention of electricity in holy scripture. None. So we don't feel right, as God-fearing people, worshipping this intangible, unknown, and possibly pagan, force," explained the governor.

"We soundly trounced the theory of evolution in our schools and we can kick our addiction to street lights, appliances, and hastily-warmed food."

Photographs taken at night by satellites now show Georgia as a dark blotch against the starry tapestry of electrically-lit U.S. cities. Commenting on the sight from the International Space Station, US astronaut Bill Shepard said, "Looking at the U.S. from space, at night, is like watching some giant, pulsing brain filled with bright racing thoughts. Except for Georgia, I mean. It's pitch black."

Georgia's governor defends the dismantling of the transmission lines and generators throughout the state.

"I know some people twist the holy word and say it's in there, starting with Exodus 1:22, where it says, 'And Pharaoh charged all his people, saying, Every son that is aborn ye shall cast into the river, and every daughter ye shall save alive.'"

"But the word "charge" is misunderstood. We believe in this case the Bible is referring to paying for purchases in future monthly installments."

"We did drown a few first-born sons, however, before we realized we were being duped by fast-talkers from the North," admitted the lieutenant governor.

Sitting in on an outdoor high school classroom, this reporter watched Georgia's young science students learn about the other forces of nature from a faith-based instructor.

"As I burn this piece of wood, you can see the flame - which is fire - and the smoke - which is air. And when we're done, the ash is clearly earth. There is a very small amount of water in the wood, which was hard to spot in this
demonstration."

"So there you have it, children, to the naked eye God's handiwork is quite clear; everything is made of four elements."

Just then, a bolt of lightning cracked across the sky, striking one student and setting his clothing on fire. Dazed, he ran about the yard burning until he died from the pain.

"What was that?" yelled one of his classmates to the instructor.

"No one knows," he said, calmly, "No one will ever know."

"It's God's will; what are you gonna do?" said one smiling, peaceful teen as she collected up her very thin textbooks and headed off to Abstinence class.